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brentw

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NW_Cryptid

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Alright so I don't expect anyone to read this because it's long and dumb and pointless, but considering this is the anarchy thread and I can post whatever I want. I'm going to tell you all about the time when a man who claimed to be from the future somehow correctly predicted some weirdly accurate shit , only to just vanish and no one knew who the fuck he was.

So anyways this would have happened back around 2011 I was big in the rave scene and a few of my hippy friends invited me out to a festival. I figured it was a good waste of my time since there was likely going to be some hot people, very likely some good shit; and you know just chill music or whatever. So yeah, I went to this little underground festival that was going on over the weekend, the first nearly 4 - 6 hours were uneventful. Most people just stuck to their own groups, music was whatever, and no one seemed to really be enjoying themselves but you know we got in for free because a friend of mine was one of the DJs for the event so I'm not going to complain, it sure as hell beat sitting at home wanking all weekend because I was a dumb teen with no real hobbies (yeah I was pretty sad back then that's not important) so anyways we're all sitting around eating some brownies and waiting for fuck all to happen when this random guy who literally none of us know comes by our tent asking if he can come in. None of us want anything to do with this guy but he's persistent and finally a friend of mine asked if he would leave us alone if we listened to whatever he had to say. He agreed that if we'd give him a moment of our time he'd let us be, and as a bunch of high dumb teens we were more than happy to just listen to whatever weird shit he wanted to say and get him to leave. He comes into our tent and I have no idea how, refers to each of us by name claiming he is "from the future" and how "a lot of bad shit is going to happen at this fest" but he wanted to keep us safe because apparently in the last dimension he came from we were the only people who were nice to him so he wants to return the favor. So far none of us are buying it but we figure we'll just humor the guy, I mean we're all high off our tits and bored as hell so this at least gave us a good laugh. At the time we didn't even question how he knew our names since again, we were so high we hardly knew our own names. Anyways we actually sort of get into it and start asking him dumb shit like "if we were so nice to you what did we do?" and he explained that one of us saved him from getting trampled in the mosh pit, another one of us apparently fucked him (she seemed very disgusted by the thought when he mentioned it, and I don't blame her the guy looked and smelled like he hadn't showered in months and hygiene was not at all a concern of his) the list goes on about how our DJ friend apparently played all his favorite music, and he mentioned that I was "the only one who actually even cared that he was from another dimension" which, given my interest in space and time travel I could see as being feasible but I don't necessarily believe in it so much as I'm interested in it, so I highly doubt I'd ever actually believe the absolute nutjob. Anyways after about 3 hours of discussion it was getting late and everyone was getting ready to head out to this big field in front of the DJ booth where we were going to have a mosh pit. He urged us all to stay put, telling us that "after the third song some drunk guy lights himself on fire and runs into the crowd" we all kind of laughed it off, but he seemed really concerned so we told him if that's the case, we'd only go dance for two songs and then sit the third one out. Now I can't stress enough how many weird plot holes we'd already found in his story, like how he told me that apparently I cared he was from another dimension, but that would have meant he jumped at least 2 dimensions to be in this reality with us currently. It's also very unlikely our friend actually fucked him since, well; for starters she's a lesbian. We figured he was just some crazy guy looking to get some puss by making up this elaborate story, probably high off his balls. Regardless, we decide to stay true to our word and sit the third song out, at which point about halfway through the song some absolute nutcase actually does go running into the crowd after lighting himself on fire. This is when we all began to question how the hell he could have made that happen, we weren't about to humor that this man was ACTUALLY from another dimension as it was way more likely he convinced some drunk guy to go light himself on fire and run through the crowd. Thankfully the guy was okay since people quickly managed to put him out using a few nearby kegs of water. Since this was an underground festival most people brought entire cooler kegs full of ice and water so we could keep everyone hydrated and thankfully there were plenty of these up near the DJ booth. After we had gone to question our supposed time traveler about why he would do something so stupid as to convince someone to do something like that he kept promising that he didn't do anything and that he had seen this all before and was just trying to keep us safe. He then ran off and came back a couple minutes later with a bottle of water handing it to a friend of mine and telling her that "you're going to start throwing up soon, you had too many brownies and they're not sitting well with you." Which, she did; about 3 minutes after telling him off explaining she felt fine only to stop and rush out of the tent to vomit. At this point we were all pretty mad at the guy, seeing as how we figured he either caused this to happen somehow or he must have known she had ate too much and is trying to make stuff up for credibility. I told him if he didn't just leave us alone like he promised I'd take it up with the security staff which he explained was a bad idea since according to him the security staff already left, after getting into an argument with the festival organizers since one of them had fucked one of the security people's girlfriends and they got in this big stupid fight about it. This mind you, also turned out to be true; but again could have been explained if he simply overheard the whole ordeal. We were so tired of this person that we just wanted to leave, he wasn't going to leave us alone and no one was actually enjoying themselves but he urged us to wait until that Sunday since there was a few people at the festival who were going to go joy riding that night while high and that they get into a car accident with a group of people trying to leave early. We again got upset over this man's bold and frankly fake ass claims and my friend pulls his car around while we're packing up so we can go home. We get everything packed, pull up the GPS, and start to head off the main fest grounds before some fucking asshole higher than a bunch of clouds hits our front end sending our car spiraling off the road. Thankfully no one was hurt but at this point everyone in the car was practically yelling in frustration because everything this man had mentioned had been true so far, I caught myself actually starting to believe this guy and it wasn't until my friend driving the car mentioned "isn't that what he said, that YOU were the one who actually believed him? Don't start making more of his bullshit sound true" that I snapped out of that dumbass mindset. In a fit of anger my friend gets out of the car because he could see this dumbass "time traveler" approaching us. He literally ran over to him and just decked him to the ground screaming something I couldn't hear from the car. I was busy trying to make sure everyone was okay but as soon as I saw my friend trying to actually continue to kick the guy I got out and went to stop him. Our time traveler started to apologize for everything repeating that he was just trying to help and that he didn't mean to make us all angry and cause so much trouble for us. He told us he'd just leave like he said, and I got my friend to come back to the car and help me tend to everyone's wounds. We figured we didn't care what the fucker did so long as he left us alone, and I swear as my friend turned around to tell the guy he would have to pay for the tow truck, he noticed that the man was literally just gone. He just vanished, and no one could find him the whole night. I still to this day wonder if we were all just too high to properly understand anything that happened during that weekend. We even asked around the festival and no one seems to have known the guy so he seems to have just shown up out of nowhere, and leave without anyone noticing. The whole thing feels like a bad fever dream.
 
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brentw

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So you met a time-traveler/dimension-hopper, who correctly predicted the future multiple times, and you yelled at and attacked him just like a bunch of dumb hollywood movie characters?
 
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"RAPE RAPE
RAPE RAPE
RAPE RAPE
RAPE RAPE
MAKE HER SUCK YA DICK
THE FIRST DATE
YOU SCARED TO RAPE A BITCH?
I CANT RELATE
SHE LET ME IN HER HOUSE
NOBODY SAFE
NOW PASS THE PLATE
RAPE RAPE
SHE LET ME TEXT HER
WONT LET ME TOUCH HER
SHE SAYS SHE CANT FUCK
IM LIKE HER BROTHER
KICK DOWN THE DOOR UNANNOUNCED
WHILE SHE LAY ON THE COUCH
I GIVES A FUCK THIS YO HOUSE
PLACE THAT CROTCH ON MY MOUTH!!
RAPE RAPE
RAPE RAPE
RAPE RAPE
ON THE FIRST FUCKIN DATE
RAPE RAPE
RAPE RAPE
PUT THAT PUSSY ON MY MOTHA FUCKIN FACE
it feels better when she aint awake
it feels better uninvited to her place
put that coke on a plate
and put that coke in my face
see i dont need your permission
i wanna see how you taste
i rape rape
rape rape
i rape rape
rape rape
i rape rape
rape rape
i rape rape
it feel better when you aint awake"
- r9k anon
This is probably from the Matt Harris manifesto.

 
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mydadiscar

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mydadiscar

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mydadiscar

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View: https://youtu.be/CSQRfHTPs10
 
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tora

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Where did you get these? Dr. Don Wario?
Hey it's me (I'm Dr. Don Wario The Sultan of Sissification) and you weren't wearing your mask. im immunocompromised because im trans. it's pretty Scr*wed up you would put me at risk of covid over the net.

Sincerely, The Sultan
 
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