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Midwest

Midwest

You Will Eventually Be Forgotten
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  • Midwest
    culturewars.com

    EMJ Live 93: The Collapse of Neocon Catholicism — Culture Wars

    EMJ Live is every Friday at 5:00pm EST Call In - Telegram: t.me/EMichaelJonesChat?videochat Cozy: cozy.tv/emichaeljones Rumble: rumble.com/c/c-920885 Twitter: twitter.com/emichaeljones1 Rabbi Solomon Friedman Clip: https://x.com/DrLoupis/status/1844202363478999360 Al Goldstein Wiki:
    culturewars.com culturewars.com
    Along with praying for the election, let us also pray that the Church and Her people will be protected from political allegiances masquerading as "Catholic doctrine."
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    LiraTirsoCaduceo
    LiraTirsoCaduceo
    Here we've been having a resurgence of neocon Catholics talking about "private property, God, Fatherland, and family".
    They always put private property first. Like those who go, "John Paul II, Reagan, and Thatcher". The idea of two dimensional politics really hurts religious people by making them think their interests align with liberalism.
    Midwest
    Health update. My hematologist said with where my hemoglobin levels are at that I'm basically 75 years old even thought I'm only 28. He's just as confused as I am since I don't smoke or do steroids which are the main contributors. So I'll be having a sleep study sometime next week to see if I have sleep apnea. My breathing is a bit weird and lately I'm noticing that I find myself out of breath (never really had this problem before).
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    cone
    cone
    What alerted you to get your hemoglobin levels checked?
    Midwest
    Midwest
    Well those results came from a blood test my nurse practitioner wanted. My levels have been slightly elevated for a while but not this bad. I've gained weight which might have affected my sleep/blood but I'm not nearly as stressed as I was last year so I'm not suffering from insomnia anymore. So honestly I have no idea.
    InternetGeist
    InternetGeist
    best luck to you, fren. that sounds terrible
    Midwest
    Is there a term for feeling like everyone has a negative perception about you? Like you're always thinking to yourself: "My boss? Oh, he probably hates me. My family? They probably don't want someone like me. That cute co-worker? Why would she think about me?"
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    Punp
    Punp
    No, wearing a mask is feigning being hopeful. Being hopeful means embodying it in your true thoughts and actions.
    Ross_Я
    Ross_Я
    There's no hope in that.
    If I'd embodied my true thoughts I'd slit my wrists and called it a day. Some - and likely fake - hope is a lie that keeps me alive.
    I wouldn't even say that some part of a masquerade is a must. It's just, perhaps, it is next to impossible to get rid of the mask completely.
    Is it even a mask at this point...
    Either way, the point is - there's no 'must'. You mustn't be anything you are not. Just strive to be the best of what you can be and that should be enough.
    Punp
    Punp
    ngl Ross you're being a bit fuckin' retarded and misreading everything I've written (even words like "must", "embody" and "hope"), so do what's good for you fam.
    Midwest
    Someone help a retard (me) out. Is mobile game dev any different from console/PC game dev? I've tried working with indie devs on the GameJolt forums but they were just as retarded as I am.
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    RisingThumb
    RisingThumb
    The main differences is the graphics API you'll be using will typically be older(no Vulkan I think, so you'll be doing OpenGL), and your input is with the touchscreen, so you'll have to design around that. You also have a couple extra inputs with the speaker and the fact it can detect orientation and movement, but those are rarely used(I saw a couple of marble moving games that used this). If you're using Godot, all that is handled for you, and you just use the compatibility renderer.

    The other thing is you'll have a weaker CPU and GPU to work with, so it has to perform better or you'll have to make things simpler. If you're still a rookie, I'd avoid 3D games for phones as they usually need more complex controller inputs, and also need a good understanding of materials and writing efficient shaders.

    You'll also have to integrate with some API for microtransactions if that's what you want to do. I'd actually recommend against making a game for apple phones too since iirc they take down any software that's been up for 2 years without update, which since games can reach a point of being finished, means you'd have to release useless updates to avoid that.
    EDIT: Also another thing you'll have to design around is that phones come in like a gazillion different resolutions, so your UI code has to adapt to whatever resolution smoothly.
    Midwest
    Midwest
    Thanks @RisingThumb I absolutely hate anything to do with Apple so if I were to make a mobile game it'd probably be Android only. I think having a weaker CPU and GPU really isn't a huge deal since it's not like anyone is really playing AAA level games on mobile. Most are just looking for easy experiences like a game of Solitaire or 2048. So making something "simple" is really what I'd want to do.
    RisingThumb
    RisingThumb
    If it's something simple, Godot or even C+Raylib will be more than enough
    Midwest
    Sorry I haven't been online - haven't been feeling myself lately. Hope that changes soon.
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    Midwest
    Midwest
    @LostintheCycle I finally got your joke after like an hour. Wow I'm dumb.
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    LostintheCycle
    LostintheCycle
    I know that feeling. I can't stand the holidays anymore because if I don't keep active with something, I feel terrible. At the same time I am kind of overworked right now, so I'm excited for the holidays. It feels like a purge-gorge cycle that I haven't shaken off yet.
    Ross_Я
    Ross_Я
    >but I need at least something to do, if that makes sense.
    Start a YouTube channel. Mod games. Hunt obscure music. Scan old books. Et cetera.
    I definitely need at least something to do as well, but my hobbies are so numerous my only real problem from unemployment is the fact that I lack money. If only I had money...
    Midwest
    Midwest
    Honestly have no idea whether I should post this new blog post since it's almost too depressing. I could just let it sit on my google drive I guess. Most of it is just aimless rambling anyway (maybe I could make it more concise or less personal??).
    Some_porcupine
    Some_porcupine
    man, have you ever read mine... i dont even do, it is emberrassing and repetititve navelgazing...
    Midwest
    Midwest
    I'll have to check your blog out, @Some_porcupine . I try to have a narrative or some sort of message with each post but lately I just haven't been in the mood to write.
    MySpace Tom
    MySpace Tom
    Why keep it in the dark? Put it out into the world
    Midwest
    So, uh, my priest brought up furries in his homily today. :monkaW:
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    Midwest
    Midwest
    I couldn't see myself with Rarity. Always using my money for unnecessary shopping. Way too much makeup caked on her face. No thanks.
    LostintheCycle
    LostintheCycle
    She is hard-working and makes her own money. I'd be getting her to buy me unnecessary things. After all, she is the element of generosity!
    Midwest
    Midwest
    So you want her to be your sugarmommy? Lmao, sounds like every NEETs dream. I can respect that so long as two actually have a good relationship together I guess.
    Midwest
    What if I told you I was still running Windows 8.1?
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    Waninem
    Waninem
    @Kana wait I thought the lost continent of Lemuria or Mu was the birthplace of civilization allegedly? Either way great to know we all come from the UK. (It's been constant spring-ish weather since I got here with the exception of February, you can't convince me this isn't Hyperboria.)
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    Kana
    Kana
    @Waninem the white race is more Hyperborean and Atlantean then Lemurian. Lemuria came before them both but is the predecessor to the negroid, aboriginal races and dalit races But not native american and south american
    endless_self
    endless_self
    i liked the discussion much more when we were talking about windows versions... :melsd:
    Midwest

    Blog Post

    themissingtouch.neocities.org themissingtouch.neocities.org
    New blog post is up. This is part one of a series on sexuality and historical revisionism - in particular how LGBT advocates distort religious history and ancient culture to fit their narrative. There are much broader implications of the dangers this type of revisionism imposes on people (particularly young and impressionable people) but I'm saving that for part 2.
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    Ross_Я
    Ross_Я
    Midwest said:
    For artists, think of your character (or the character from your favorite anime or manga you wish to portray) as being a real person deserving of dignity.
    Click to expand...
    I remember rather vividly that back in the day - like, about 15 years ago - when I made the same point, saying something along the lines of "don't you think your character would've been disgusted by this scene?" I've been replied with "this is my character, why would he be disgusted?"
    And the underlying messages are clear: the character... is not quite a person in the mind of such an artist. It is a puppet. It is bound to the will of a creator. It is, perhaps, the extension of the creator's oneself. And I think this is where all the problems come from. From your other blogpost:
    Midwest said:
    if you are a creative person or someone who has an idea, you can find virtually anything that matches what you dream about. To the individual who has a negative relationship with the "real world," - this is their home. To the one that has consistently struggled making friends or never found their true love, the virtual worlds of the Internet offer them that and so much more. They can engage in visual novels with beautiful girls that will never reject them, read or write fiction where they're the hero and nothing goes wrong, or talk to a chatbot that will "love" them unconditionally.
    Click to expand...
    I think this is the problem: it is all about the whole fantasy thing being centered on "self" first and foremost. To create a real person, you need, in some degree, to experience the death of the ego. To write the character into the story, you need to get rid of self and play character's role, not your role.
    Perhaps, this is why I love the escapism so much: I never really experienced any of those troubles. For some reason, from the very point one, I never really tried to insert myself into my fantasies. I just created a world - not the perfect world, not the world that would suit me - but just a world. And I just created characters - not the characters who could've been my best friends or my perfect romance - but just characters.
    Perhaps that's why I'm so good as a GM at TTRPGs: I do not like to insert myself in my world too much to start with. Is the world I imagined better than this one? Yes, I think so. But it still has its fair share of problems and quite dubious things - and that's what makes it fascinating in my mind. So are the people there, that are alive and each a personality of their own: heck, I wouldn't want to be even pals with some of my characters, because they are meant to be evil bastards to start with; I wouldn't want them nowhere near me.
    I guess, this is something a proper author understands: that you have to create something more than things you like - you have to create things you dislike as well. Perhaps, the most heard example of this rule is an infamous "kill your darlings". Swap that to "kill your waifu" - and ask yourself just how many authors could do that. And that's what separates a proper author from the one who just wants to fill a hole in his heart with his creations.
    And when I said I am good as a GM at TTRPGs - I'm not bad as a player as well. Once again, I do not want to live out some kind of power fantasy - I just play the role of a character in question.
    I think, this... "death of ego in fantasy" is a recipe for the... healthy escapism, if you wish. The downside? I'm still depressed and lonely in my life. Because my "healthy", non-self-centered escapism obviously cannot give me the same amount of satisfaction that the usual kind of escapism can.
    Make no mistake: I love my world, and I'd gladly spend some time there in the end of the day, and I'd chose them over real life any moment. I think, I already pretty much see life only as a canvas that helps me to expand the "true" world inside my head, and I like escaping from reality as much as you can possibly imagine, given the amount of movies, games and books I've went through.
    And yet it is never self-centered. And so in the end of the day all my escapism compared to the escapism of someone who has waifus or even tulpas... It's like comparing a cup of coffee with a shot of methamphetamine or something.

    Pardon me if I was a bit hectic, but I hope you get the ideas I tried to express.
    Midwest
    Midwest
    @Ross_Я Your idea of "killing your darlings" is something I'm trying really hard to learn as an amateur writer/artist. With the first few short stories I wrote, they were basically escapist fantasies to help me cope with my depression - really no different from the current slop that is modern anime being released today. I'm sure a lot of people who would go on /a/ would consider me a casual because I haven't watched certain classics or know about certain topics enough - but I'm starting to become glad that I'm not that kind of person. My newest story idea is something I'm a lot more happy with because I don't want it to have a generic happy ending or hero's journey cycle. It's about the Indigenous peoples of America and the Puritan colonizers who settled, and the relationship between two boys - a native and an English boy - who become friends along the way. But I want it to be a tragedy that leaves you with a sense of despair and the realization that there is no hope because we already know who won in the end. My plan is for it to be a "reversal" of American hero myth stories and adventure stories that we told to American children in grade school.
    Ross_Я
    Ross_Я
    Frankly, I do not think the problem ever goes away. As you develop (or, if I may say, learn more about) a likeable character, you will inevitably feel attachment to the character in question. I mean, it's, like, natural. That's why the character is likeable in the first place, right? So no matter if you are amateur or not, you will have to fight yourself to, like, literally accept the fact that the character is gone.

    And be sure to share your story when it is done.
    Midwest
    So I could have mild polycythemia and I honestly am just so confused. I did a blood test today so I'll get an update on my health soon I guess. :ghostWut:
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    Midwest
    Midwest
    It's real weird. Obviously I'm not in great health but I can't say the past year has been great to me with the sleep problems and weight gain. My nurse practitioner suggested I might have sleep apnea but I doubt it. So I'll just have to wait and see. Maybe I'll find a way to improve my diet in the mean time.
    Andy Kaufman
    Andy Kaufman
    oh damn. I never heard of this. Is this something that can get treated once and then it's gone or is it a permanent condition?
    Midwest
    Midwest
    It can be treated with blood letting in early stages from what I understand. I don't think it's too severe just yet, but I'm hoping to get more answers soon and hopefully then I can see what I can do about it.
    Midwest
    Went to see Alien: Romulus yesterday. Really good! Great practical effects, nice soundtrack, enjoyed the cast. The climax was a lot of fun. 7/10
    Midwest

    Blog Post

    themissingtouch.neocities.org themissingtouch.neocities.org
    New blog post is up. I talk about identities that were entirely made up by the Internet and its various subcultures, as well as the damaging effects they have. I also briefly talk about how gay and retarded the "culture war" within fandom is. Check it out.
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    Andy Kaufman
    Andy Kaufman
    well in this case I think my central European, atheist perspective and experiences are just too different from your American Christian ones
    Midwest
    Midwest
    I can appreciate that. I've only talked to one Lithuanian and a few Germans a couple years ago, but we never really got in depth when it came to conversations such as these. So I do want to hear feedback from all perspectives.
    灰の男性
    灰の男性
    The funniest about the "Ease of access" is that for a large chunk of the affected, the access cost is too high. Think of TikTok Azumanga Daioh fans, how many of them have actually watched the show they base their entire personality on? Most have not, so the situation is that you end up with a "fan-base" that has not even consumed the work proper, working by a game of broken telephone. Well the access cost threshold has increased over the years.
    Midwest
    Trying out Flux.dev for the first time. Typed in "Rodan" and ended up with Batman. :ghostWut:
    batman.png
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    alCannium27
    alCannium27
    At least that damn things seem to understand Rodan has wings. Sad my poor little 4060TI can't run it locally; I absolutely refuse to run the service on some rental cloud server.
    alCannium27
    alCannium27
    Inccidentally, I hope someone finally makes a Guyver finetune of either Pony or Flux. Seems like Flux should have no problem after just a hundred images. Might even be able to run it as just a LoRA.
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