Finding Things for You

[Chao Tse-Tung]

(This was originally going to be a simple profile post, but it got a bit long and I realized I could expand it to include a chance for discussion, so preemptive apologies for this being a lot about me)

Howdy, fellas, I've been a bit absent due to trying to not be so online, but I had an experience today that I wanted to share with all'a y'all.

A good friend of mine is back in town for the holidays, and on account of long-time no-see, him, another friend and I decided to hang out. We went and fucked around on the parkway, sat on some boulders and smoked and enjoyed the rock graffiti everywhere and had engaging conversation and watched a blazing orange sunset over a big valley, which was just a spitting image to this recurring dream-ending I've been having where I see the same view off of my front porch, but I digress. In real life, truly it was beautiful, it's been far too long since I've seen the full 360° gradient of a sunset and the godrays beaming down on distant rolling peaks from the top of a mountain, I used to get out more before I entered the fulltime workforce, and I miss that. I got a chance to do some minor rock-climbing, which was nice, as it's something I've always wanted to get a little better at.
The kicker, though, is that apparently, by some happenstance, some other believer in that whacky old obscure religious disorganization that I've immersed myself in had been to this location, too, and had left evidence, all hail Discordia! (Picrel)

Chao face reveal :^)

What, you wanted a picture of the sunset or something? Go find one yourself.

Which brings me to what made me want to make this a full-fledged post under philosophy. I remember in my psych class I took once, the professor talked about how he would convince himself to go and do things by telling himself that he would find something for himself in what he was doing. This concept immediately struck me at the time, and has stuck with me to an extent. It does seem that when we do the things that are good for us, we find things for ourselves in some capacity. Why is this? I'm sure that professor would claim that it's a simple trick of the brain, and it may very well be, to an extent. But then, it's not a trick of the brain that some other physical being made something for me to find, I have photographic proof of it! And don't take this the wrong way, I'm not narcissisticly implying that some stranger made something just for me specifically to find, I mean in a more esoteric, fate-and-individuation-driven sense.

I guess my point for discussion is, broadly, what are some of you guys' experiences with finding things for yourselves in strange places and ways? And in the deeper sense, does it mean anything to anyone else?

This isn't my strongest writing, if you'd forgive it, and feel free to ask for clarification on anything that mightve turned into an incomprehensible mush.

 

[HellManMayo]

U R Very handsome Chao :^)

My small brain is struggling to divine the meaning of "find things for yourself", but I've had similar feelings when I see crude engravings in old buildings, restrooms especially. I worked at an old manufacturing plant last summer, and there were names and references scrawled on the walls that dated back to the 1920s. It was surreal to see actual "threads" like you would in L4D2, with strangers, nearly decades apart, replying to each other. The stalls were absolutely shredded, and if it weren't for that company being so cheap it would have been swapped out half a century ago. One of my favorite graffitis came from some dude named "Joe", who dissapeared for 30 years before triumphantly replying with "JOE IS BACK (1/1/99)" in all capitals. It felt like I was witnessing a small part of something bigger, and I left my mark by calling someone an "unmitigated ass (2022)" before leaving.

Thanks for the post btw. The wiki page on Discordianism was very enlightening

 

[LostintheCycle]

I guess my point for discussion is, broadly, what are some of you guys' experiences with finding things for yourselves in strange places and ways? And in the deeper sense, does it mean anything to anyone else?

I do wish I had an experience I could recall myself like this. But I don't really. The graffiti around my area is honestly, lackluster. The local bathroom graffiti is not very interesting unlike what HellManMayo described. So I liven it up myself. Whenever I did a shit at my tertiary school, I'd leave something (no I don't just mean an unflushed turd). I even took photos!
Here is an experiment I did with type which I photographed.

Another time I drew an eye which was at the eye level of one sitting on the toilet, that way they feel as if they are being stared at while they shit.

I like to wonder about what sort of effect it had on those who came to the stall to do their mundane business, only to find the strange things I had left there. Perhaps I could at least evoke some surprise or bewilderment in some people, but maybe there's someone out there who is intrigued by what I do. That's the whole point of why I leave these things, even if it gets cleaned inevitably (which is actually good because they don't look great anyway)
It's honestly made me wonder if I should take a shot at more interesting graffiti, like spraying on walls or printing stickers. I don't particularly like the typical style of street graffiti, even when its well done, besides I don't want to impress people with my skill or whatever. I just want to leave an interesting idea out there.
I hope that I'll one day run into something like you described, something for me. So far I haven't though.

We went and fucked

Based homosexual

 

[CahCaw]

It does seem that when we do the things that are good for us, we find things for ourselves in some capacity.

I don't know if it is far fetched, but this idea seems to resonate a lot with this way of life I took up some years ago. This way of life I've been living goes something like this: if you search for enough randomness in life, you'll eventually find the right random thing to make it all worth it. Let me get some examples.

I think the best example of this, is how I would try to make friends online. I would do this by just messaging as many people as I could, trying to pose interesting questions, tell stories and just do whatever to make the conversation go in an unexpected direction. Usually this wouldn't go anywhere, better yet, it hardly ever did. I'd start conversations with 20 people, 10 would respond, 3 of which would have a conversation that didn't instantly die, and usually the last one would die not even a week later. But, it all felt so random, and I felt if I persisted, I'd get somewhere.

It was like playing that stupid-ass game 'yahtzee'. You keep rolling the die, hoping for a different result. Then, I got into this really interesting conversation with this German guy. The conversation, just wouldn't stop. Mind you, this was also during the 1st covid lockdown, so we were all kind of bored, and we had all day to have this absurd conversations about life. What was even more interesting? He lived not even 100km away from me. Fast forward 2.5 years later, and now we are irl friends, whereby we don't talk as much via text anymore, but we meet every month or two. We go to each other parties, show each other cool places (mannn he knows so many interesting places in his big-ass german city). I knew something interesting would happen if I keep messaging random people.

And I have so many other online friends who I've found through this method, including another irl friend who I've known through my online endeavors, only he lives 200km away. We usually always bring both of our mountain bikes, and then just commit as much mischief as one can with an entire day of ambitions.

I remember even one time finding someone who lived 5km away, mind you, the method I used always got people from around the globe (international). So you can imagine how many people I must've messaged to get someone who lived 5km away lol. Sadly he wasn't keen on being friends / meeting up.

But my rolling of the die doesn't end at finding interesting people online. I see the internet as a whole as this giant game of Yahtzee. On shitty sites, like instagram, 90% of >reddit, or in general normieland, you can roll the die as many times as you want, and you'll always be left with the same bland algorithm-pleasing content that doesn't lead to anything else. I always imagine myself of increasing my chances, by staying on the more 'interesting' and 'unpredictable' side of the internet (that being said, the internet feels kind of dead in that regard). Think of the 10% of >reddit that still has something interesting to say (like the irl friends of earlier, which I found through subreddits that were dedicated to people making posts & people DMing them, with that being the entire purpose of the subreddit, or the subreddits being about psychedelics, or glitches in the matrix, but tbh I've stopped using it these days because the state of >reddit these days has gotten unbearable these days compared to even a few years ago). Youtube however is still a consistent place for a lot of interesting things, especially the videos about geopolitics fascinate me.

Other interesting finds was a guide to reading cyrillic, which I used to then start writing a shit-ton of thoughts I couldn't get off my chest anywhere else, by writing English using cyrillic characters (лайк тыс хахахаха). Or the time that online german friend of mine mentioned something about a treehouse, and I then built this huge treehouse with an irl friend of mine who lived closeby (which ended with a giant saga, including park-rangers, police, 8 relatives being the owner of that plot of land because they inherited it by their dead parents who bought it in 1954, more police, having a date when I needed to demolish it because there were restrictions on the land not allowing anyone to build there, me seeking attention at an edditorial, and ending up on the biggest regional news paper's front page, and me having delayed this order to demolish it until further notice because I made a huge overdramatic sob story about it). Signs are everywhere, and I take these signs whenever I can to see if I can get even more signs. Signs usually start with the right people though.

HONESTLY, that brings me to my next point - how this forum has honestly become the last bastion of this Yahtzee game of mine - just hoping for something interesting to happen. Honestly, already does. I like the internet's most well kept secret.

 

[Chao Tse-Tung]

U R Very handsome Chao :^)

My small brain is struggling to divine the meaning of "find things for yourself", but I've had similar feelings when I see crude engravings in old buildings, restrooms especially. I worked at an old manufacturing plant last summer, and there were names and references scrawled on the walls that dated back to the 1920s. It was surreal to see actual "threads" like you would in L4D2, with strangers, nearly decades apart, replying to each other. The stalls were absolutely shredded, and if it weren't for that company being so cheap it would have been swapped out half a century ago. One of my favorite graffitis came from some dude named "Joe", who dissapeared for 30 years before triumphantly replying with "JOE IS BACK (1/1/99)" in all capitals. It felt like I was witnessing a small part of something bigger, and I left my mark by calling someone an "unmitigated ass (2022)" before leaving.

Thanks for the post btw. The wiki page on Discordianism was very enlightening

This is a wonderful little experience to see, I love those a lot, myself. In an attempt to clarify what I mean by finding things for yourself, I suppose I mean seeing or hearing things that resonate with you on a deeper level. Could be in the "whoa I like, understand this and relate to it" way, or in the "holy shit that's incredible and I'm going to remember it" way. Which honestly, it sounds like you mostly understood anyways, a fun little situation in an old plant where you have a chance to be entertained and feel like a part of something is a wonderful example of finding something for you in an unexpected place.
If you're real interested in Discordianism, I'd heavily recommend looking up an online copy of Principia Discoridia, I fully believe everyone should read that book once lol.

I do wish I had an experience I could recall myself like this. But I don't really. The graffiti around my area is honestly, lackluster. The local bathroom graffiti is not very interesting unlike what HellManMayo described. So I liven it up myself. Whenever I did a shit at my tertiary school, I'd leave something (no I don't just mean an unflushed turd). I even took photos!
Here is an experiment I did with type which I photographed.
View attachment 48423
Another time I drew an eye which was at the eye level of one sitting on the toilet, that way they feel as if they are being stared at while they shit.
View attachment 48424
I like to wonder about what sort of effect it had on those who came to the stall to do their mundane business, only to find the strange things I had left there. Perhaps I could at least evoke some surprise or bewilderment in some people, but maybe there's someone out there who is intrigued by what I do. That's the whole point of why I leave these things, even if it gets cleaned inevitably (which is actually good because they don't look great anyway)
It's honestly made me wonder if I should take a shot at more interesting graffiti, like spraying on walls or printing stickers. I don't particularly like the typical style of street graffiti, even when its well done, besides I don't want to impress people with my skill or whatever. I just want to leave an interesting idea out there.
I hope that I'll one day run into something like you described, something for me. So far I haven't though.

This is all very fun, and your stuff is really cool! I've also done my fair share of dorky bathroom drawing and writing and other graffiti, hoping to be the thing that resonates with someone else. It's also fun to leave things around, like Discordian Pope Cards printed en masse and the like. Keep in mind, I don't mean to limit the post to vandalistic art, half of what I found for myself was a sunset from my dream, and many, many times, the things I find for myself are words from people's mouths.

 

[Chao Tse-Tung]

I don't know if it is far fetched, but this idea seems to resonate a lot with this way of life I took up some years ago. This way of life I've been living goes something like this: if you search for enough randomness in life, you'll eventually find the right random thing to make it all worth it. Let me get some examples.

I think the best example of this, is how I would try to make friends online. I would do this by just messaging as many people as I could, trying to pose interesting questions, tell stories and just do whatever to make the conversation go in an unexpected direction. Usually this wouldn't go anywhere, better yet, it hardly ever did. I'd start conversations with 20 people, 10 would respond, 3 of which would have a conversation that didn't instantly die, and usually the last one would die not even a week later. But, it all felt so random, and I felt if I persisted, I'd get somewhere.

It was like playing that stupid-ass game 'yahtzee'. You keep rolling the die, hoping for a different result. Then, I got into this really interesting conversation with this German guy. The conversation, just wouldn't stop. Mind you, this was also during the 1st covid lockdown, so we were all kind of bored, and we had all day to have this absurd conversations about life. What was even more interesting? He lived not even 100km away from me. Fast forward 2.5 years later, and now we are irl friends, whereby we don't talk as much via text anymore, but we meet every month or two. We go to each other parties, show each other cool places (mannn he knows so many interesting places in his big-ass german city). I knew something interesting would happen if I keep messaging random people.

And I have so many other online friends who I've found through this method, including another irl friend who I've known through my online endeavors, only he lives 200km away. We usually always bring both of our mountain bikes, and then just commit as much mischief as one can with an entire day of ambitions.

I remember even one time finding someone who lived 5km away, mind you, the method I used always got people from around the globe (international). So you can imagine how many people I must've messaged to get someone who lived 5km away lol. Sadly he wasn't keen on being friends / meeting up.

But my rolling of the die doesn't end at finding interesting people online. I see the internet as a whole as this giant game of Yahtzee. On shitty sites, like instagram, 90% of >reddit, or in general normieland, you can roll the die as many times as you want, and you'll always be left with the same bland algorithm-pleasing content that doesn't lead to anything else. I always imagine myself of increasing my chances, by staying on the more 'interesting' and 'unpredictable' side of the internet (that being said, the internet feels kind of dead in that regard). Think of the 10% of >reddit that still has something interesting to say (like the irl friends of earlier, which I found through subreddits that were dedicated to people making posts & people DMing them, with that being the entire purpose of the subreddit, or the subreddits being about psychedelics, or glitches in the matrix, but tbh I've stopped using it these days because the state of >reddit these days has gotten unbearable these days compared to even a few years ago). Youtube however is still a consistent place for a lot of interesting things, especially the videos about geopolitics fascinate me.

Other interesting finds was a guide to reading cyrillic, which I used to then start writing a shit-ton of thoughts I couldn't get off my chest anywhere else, by writing English using cyrillic characters (лайк тыс хахахаха). Or the time that online german friend of mine mentioned something about a treehouse, and I then built this huge treehouse with an irl friend of mine who lived closeby (which ended with a giant saga, including park-rangers, police, 8 relatives being the owner of that plot of land because they inherited it by their dead parents who bought it in 1954, more police, having a date when I needed to demolish it because there were restrictions on the land not allowing anyone to build there, me seeking attention at an edditorial, and ending up on the biggest regional news paper's front page, and me having delayed this order to demolish it until further notice because I made a huge overdramatic sob story about it). Signs are everywhere, and I take these signs whenever I can to see if I can get even more signs. Signs usually start with the right people though.

HONESTLY, that brings me to my next point - how this forum has honestly become the last bastion of this Yahtzee game of mine - just hoping for something interesting to happen. Honestly, already does. I like the internet's most well kept secret.

I have like a lot to say to this but also have to work, so this is a placeholder reply until I get the chance to type for a minute. I love where you went with this, though

 

[LostintheCycle]

Other interesting finds was a guide to reading cyrillic, which I used to then start writing a shit-ton of thoughts I couldn't get off my chest anywhere else, by writing English using cyrillic characters (лайк тыс хахахаха).

That's funny, I used to do this when I was 15 if I wanted to write sappy poetry on the bus without anyone seeing what it was. I realized at some point though that my area is full of a lot of other Slavic immigrants, so I stopped

 

[CahCaw]

I have like a lot to say to this but also have to work, so this is a placeholder reply until I get the chance to type for a minute. I love where you went with this, though

Still awaiting that reply. Did you happen to forget? I am really curious about what you have to say

 

[Chao Tse-Tung]

Still awaiting that reply. Did you happen to forget? I am really curious about what you have to say

Oh shit lol, I did forget about this, my apologies!



This is an amazing example of what I was talking about, the faux-cyrillic is a very interesting use you found for it. It seems like you've taken an approach similar to the idea I put forth in the main post just in your generalized usage of the internet, and I can heavily respect that, it's something I'd like to pick up on. I love that you call it yahtzee, that's hilarious and I dig it.



I think that it's important to find connections from yourself into the world around you, and I think I had some grander and more eloquent way of putting this when I first read your post, but I think its really beautiful that your connections to the world are connections to others, and a way that you can disconnect with others.

 

[CahCaw]

Oh shit lol, I did forget about this, my apologies!



This is an amazing example of what I was talking about, the faux-cyrillic is a very interesting use you found for it. It seems like you've taken an approach similar to the idea I put forth in the main post just in your generalized usage of the internet, and I can heavily respect that, it's something I'd like to pick up on. I love that you call it yahtzee, that's hilarious and I dig it.



I think that it's important to find connections from yourself into the world around you, and I think I had some grander and more eloquent way of putting this when I first read your post, but I think its really beautiful that your connections to the world are connections to others, and a way that you can disconnect with others.

Technically speaking it's not even 'faux-cyrillic', because that tries to pair up cyrillic letters with latin one's based on the way they look, instead of the sound they produce.


But I agree with your grander idea, beyond just the context of the internet. I've witnessed so much connection, which should've just been mere chance. It's why I want to hear more ngl


Speaking of the devil: "I think that it's important to find connections from yourself into the world around you". How do you feel like you're achieving this, on a grander scale? That which you put forth in your post seems like a smaller thing, but are there also 'bigger' things, which have a grander impact, which also fall under this category?

 

[Andy Kaufman]

@CahCaw I live in Germany and I have an eerily similar story about an online friend I then met IRL. Same timeframe too.
He's from the Netherlands and I invited him over to a shooting range here because the Dutch are even more anti fun than we are. lol.


On Topic, also about grafitti because the OP unburied this memory:
about 12 years ago my friend and me were doing some urban exploration. there were a few abandoned hangars from the Allies after WW2 when Germany was still occuppied and they were marked for teardown. So before they were gone, we decided to sneak onto the compound and explore.
Tons of grafitti and other signs of teens like us hanging out there but I remember one tag. "Senf war hier" which translates to "mustard was here".
2 years later, I'm with one of the friends I explored the hangar with in a university for some kind of information day for apsiring students. We're sitting in a lecture hall in a city 2 hours away from home. on the student desk I'm sitting at, carved into the wood I read the line "senf war hier".
Naturally, we were dumbstruck by this coincidence.

Off Topic:
I hate grafitti. It makes everything look grungy, poor and dirty. Now if some idiots want to ruin their own neighbourhood (because it's 90% dirty tags instead of proper pieces anway), fine. But rock grafitti i.e. vandalizing nature is even worse.

 

[eris]

Ooh, got a good one here

I am in Berlin, tripping on acid. That morning had bought some stuff, had it with me in a bag. We stopped at a cafe at some point to get some water and choke on some food, and I went to the toilet and forgot to take the bag back out with me. We're gone for about 20-30 minutes after this, and are crossing a bridge. I then see this graffiti:



Immediately go "oh shit my bag" and turn and sprint back to the cafe as fast as I can. Turns out cafe staff dudes had found it, asked me what was in the bag, I answered, bag returned.

It is hard not to see this as meant for me, it's too on the nose and weird shit like this always happens when you're tripping.

 

[LostintheCycle]

This thread has made me think a bit more about graffiti in general so I had a look into it a bit the last few days, honestly I get it even less. It seems to just be about 'getting your name out there', graffiti for the sake of itself, which I don't get. I also agree with Andy Kaufman that tags look terrible, but I even find 'good' graffiti is hit or miss because I either dont like the style of writing, or it get's that really bad 'airbrush' look. I like graffiti in principle though, without the weird fame thing and 'getting known'. I like to see something on the mundane grey walls.
My favourite thing, though I guess it's not really graffiti, is this mural of Kanye West lying with Taylor Swift and some other girl. It's somewhere on my trainline in Melbourne, so every time I go into the centre of the city I pass by it.

I've been thinking of making a couple stickers now and then though for a while. They aren't tied to your personality or whatever, easier to put up in various places, can do it in the day instead of creeping around at night, and I can use digital tools that I know how to use instead of learning how to use spray cans. It'd be nice, my specific area has a couple stickers floating around. I feel stickers have a lot more potential than just sticking your initials on it.

 

[Andy Kaufman]

This thread has made me think a bit more about graffiti in general so I had a look into it a bit the last few days, honestly I get it even less. It seems to just be about 'getting your name out there', graffiti for the sake of itself, which I don't get. I also agree with Andy Kaufman that tags look terrible, but I even find 'good' graffiti is hit or miss because I either dont like the style of writing, or it get's that really bad 'airbrush' look. I like graffiti in principle though, without the weird fame thing and 'getting known'. I like to see something on the mundane grey walls.
My favourite thing, though I guess it's not really graffiti, is this mural of Kanye West lying with Taylor Swift and some other girl. It's somewhere on my trainline in Melbourne, so every time I go into the centre of the city I pass by it.
View attachment 49088
I've been thinking of making a couple stickers now and then though for a while. They aren't tied to your personality or whatever, easier to put up in various places, can do it in the day instead of creeping around at night, and I can use digital tools that I know how to use instead of learning how to use spray cans. It'd be nice, my specific area has a couple stickers floating around. I feel stickers have a lot more potential than just sticking your initials on it.

Yeah don't get me wrong, I like the arts and (original) politics of grafitti.
But it's been gentrified since the 90s at the very least so it has lost its initial oomph for me personally. When I see it here, I always think of 17yo middle class kids trying to be edgy and rebel against their parents. We don't really have the culture here compared to where it came from.
About the grey walls:
TBH I'm not even so sure about that. Grafitti makes a place look like it's inhabited by, well, people willing to vandalize (to express it as neutral as I can) while a grey wall is boring at worst. I'd take boring over unsafe/dirty but that's my boomer ass talking.
Or rather: I'd say it's fine in places where I expect it (main train station in a big city, poorer areas in big cities) but I don't want it where I live (cosy central european small town).

 

[punishedgnome]

But it's been gentrified since the 90s at the very least so it has lost its initial oomph for me personally. When I see it here, I always think of 17yo middle class kids trying to be edgy and rebel against their parents. We don't really have the culture here compared to where it came from.

I feel like once this sort of thing goes from being an underground thing most would associate with unsavory elements to something that has mainstream acceptance as art it gets kind of hard to call it cool anymore.