I added an agora current events board to contain discussions of political and current events to that category. This was due to a increase support for a separate board for political talk.
Basically any early MMO. I play a lot of Mabinogi, Ragnarok Online, Pangya etc these days and they make me very sad. Not just from the music and overall atmosphere having a melancholic feeling but from remembering the times I was having so much fun playing these games after school compared to now where I don't really enjoy them as much. I only boot it up and play for a few minutes before I get upset and go play something else. It reminds me how much of that "spark" I lost growing up. Even when I'm not severely depressed I just cannot enjoy things or see them in the same optimistic manner that I did before. I'm no longer enamored by big virtual worlds I can lose myself into because I constantly remind myself that reality isn't like that. Parts of growing up I guess.
All I can think about is my dad dying. My dad who is very much still alive. Mind you this first occurred when I was very young and my dad was still, as he is now; still alive at the time.
How? Why? I don't know. The weird thing is that I don't even necessarily get sad from thinking about my dad dying, that's just a byproduct. I'm not saying I wouldn't be sad to see a member of my family die or whatever; just that it's not the catalyst for the sadness. I cannot stress enough that these are two different, independent thoughts. There's just something about the aura of the stage visuals and the music that makes me sad and then somehow ALSO makes me think of my dad dying.
I should probably schedule a therapy appointment, and trust me I don't mean this in some edgy way but I don't know if a therapist could fix me at this point; who the fuck thinks like this?
This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.